World War Z

Zarah's Rating: 4

Zarah’s Rating: 4

four

RATED PG-13: Sorry for such a long time since my last post, but I have been both lazy and busy (both excuses are most common, which is why they sound alike). I hope to get into the groove of blogging again.

I am a little torn on this movie, because it was really good, but it was also really lame. Allow me to elaborate. While watching this movie, and I mean physically watching this movie, like, while I was in the movie theater seat, it was entertaining. Which is good, because that’s what movies are, they are supposed to be a form of entertainment, and I will say I did not get bored once during this movie. However, the depth is really lacking. Like, so shallow that a two year old could sit in it (continuing the water depth analogy). Immediately following the movie, literally as we rode the escalator, we were all like “Wait, what? How did that make sense?”. It was kind of pointless. I mean, from a viewer perspective, it was good, but if you are looking for a movie you can really get into, and be a fan of, then this is not for you. It lacks a certain appeal beyond the whole zombie thing.

The zombies are pretty cheesy looking, and quite obviously fake, but I suppose they would frighten younger audiences. It’s hilarious how they kept chattering their teeth, though.

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This isn’t a typical review. In fact, it’s not a review at all. Officially, this is a topic up for debate, a discussion among peers, an intellectually stimulating argument. But it’s more like a rant.

Okay, so some movies and shows are sponsored by certain companies. Now, just having ads during the commercial break isn’t enough. No, they have to send subliminal messages to you during the show, that will slowly pick at your brain until you say, “Hey I’m gonna buy one!” (for example). The producers will casually slide their Nikon camera in the scene, and add a line that says, “Let me four times optimal zoom with my new Nikon DS38″ (I just made that up but it sounds legit), and they attempt to slip in there in such a way that it will be in your head but you can’t make a remote connection to as where you heard it. However, I am on a mission. I am recognizing advertisements, and I am nitpicking at how blatantly they advertise. I mean, have these companies no integrity? These movie people think they are so clever and sly but they make it so obvious to anyone who pays attention. I have a few examples.

Man of Steel – Nikon & Nokia

Lois is climbing some mountain or whatever and they switch to that scene, but first they zoom in and focus on her camera she’s holding, which clearly reads, Nikon. And then later she shows pictures to someone on the camera, and it vividly displays the Nikon D3S. I mean how evident can these cameos get??

Later, someone is on their phone and it focuses on the Nokia logo, and then when Zod takes over the computers and stuff, the agent woman lady basically says, “Oh no, he took over my Nokia smartphone with all these high tech capabilities!”

Pretty Little Liars – Camry & TRESemmé

I swear, like, half the characters in Pretty Little Liars own Toyota Camry’s (is it Camries?). They’re always showing the GPS system and emphasizing different features.

In a few episodes, TRESemmé is prominently shown. And at one point Cece says “Hey use this TRESemmé dry shampoo, you’re not the only one who didn’t shower” or something along those lines. It wasn’t that advertise-y, but you could still tell. This is actually one of the more efficient ways to advertise.

White Collar – Ford & HP

HP isn’t as deliberately shown as some of the others mentioned, and I commend them, because literally slipping it in a scene is pretty effective, because it’s in your head subconsciously. All the computers in White Collar are HP, and they focus in on the logo occasionally, but nothing more than “setting the scene”.

Ford… Oh jeez. They ALWAYS advertise Ford. More specifically, their Ford Taurus with self steering and some other great features. Peter in one episode almost causes a fender bender, and he’s like “Don’t worry, my car takes care of that with its special sensors”. They constantly show the GPS and other aspects of the car throughout the whole series. In another episode, Elizabeth is parallel parking and she makes a translucent display of holding her hands up and not touching the wheel while the car parks itself (how does it do that anyway? See, things like these are just going to increase the risk of a technological takeover).

The Vampire Diaries – Samsung

They always so all these nifty perks of Samsung phones. In one episode, Klaus doodles the words “I will” on his phone and sends it to someone in response to a text. I will admit, my poor, media-prone sister fell prey to it, and said “Whoa that’s a cool phone!” and looked it up right away. Yes, yes, one of my own succumbed to the persuasive, mind-boggling ways of marketing. First of all, why would you send someone a picture when you could easily just type it in? Second of all… that’s all I got. But, it was a pretty good point, you have to admit.

There are many more examples of ads within our favorite shows and movies, and let me tell you why they bug me.

TV SHOWS: In a show, they always have the bare minimum. If something doesn’t directly have to do with the plot or a character, they get rid of it. That’s why they barely have small talk or other regular things. With these ads, the producers try to casually insert it into a scene, so people can’t think twice about it, and it doesn’t interfere with the show, but they still please their sponsors. However, then you got people like me, who are vigilant and notice these meek attempts at discretion. You see, if I wanted to have an ad within my show, this is what I would do. I would not try to do it casually, because there is usually nothing else small talk-like in the show, so why would I try to have it now? No, I would try to emphasize my ad, but have it actually tie in with the plot. For example, in White Collar, they can have an episode centered in on a stolen car, with some apparent value. Then, call it a day, because for the rest of the season you don’t need an ad, because you had a whole dang episode dedicated to the product. In Pretty Little Liars, when Detective Wilden had his car stolen, they could’ve shown some features or whatnot.

MOVIES: You’ll notice movies are more sly with their ads. In reality, they aren’t. They are brandishing as much as the TV people do, it’s just that it fits in with the rest of the movie. You see, in movies, they have to fit in characters, setting, plot, and more in three hours or less. In shows, they have already established everything, so there is no small talk. In movies, however, they rely on small talk to show how the characters interact, and develop the setting and plot. That’s why advertisements aren’t as obvious, because the whole movie is filled with little things that aren’t really relevant to the conflict.

Oh, gosh I sound like an English teacher. This won’t do. Darn my exceedingly cultivated vocabulary.

Oh, well, stay tuned. I think the next review will be The Lion King.

Man of Steel

Zarah's Rating: 2

Zarah’s Rating: 2

two

RATED PG-13: Ahhh, Man of Steel. I have waited many a months to watch you, and boy do you disappoint. Let me give you some background:

I saw the commercial for this first in November, and they kept emphasizing how it was a Christopher Nolan film, with the same screenwriter as the Batman trilogy, so I naïvely (is that a word?) assumed that this movie would be awesome. Mistake #1. Then I went to Texas for my cousin’s graduation party (it was Gatsby themed, I’ll share a picture), and my three cousins were all pumped up to see it, and I naïvely placed value on their opinion. Mistake #2 (No offense, you guys). Then we saw it in 2D. Mistake #3 (it wasn’t really that big of a deal, but it would’ve been cooler in 3D).

First things first, giving credit where it belongs: on action I give it 5 (out of 5). It was great through all the buildings and music and stuff, and if you like action, then you’ll love it. I do like my good dose of fighting, but it seemed to drag on, and unfortunately, it didn’t appeal.

On character depth, I give it a 1 (as always, out of 5). I swear Superman had like 200 words in total (which isn’t a lot), but he threw like 400 punches. The movie didn’t really elaborate on his childhood besides the mini flashbacks, and they didn’t explain his adulthood and the various jobs he did.

Now, I don’t know if you guys look at the Genres that I place a movie under, but I also placed this one under Comedy. Comedy? Why Comedy? you may ask. Well, let me explain. This movie had the stupidest dialogue. Literally, I could’ve written it (actually that’s a bad comparison, because I’m a pretty good writer if I do say so myself, so just think that an average person could have written it). Zod (the evil dude) says (get this), “This can only end two ways: either you die, or I do.” Okay first of all this was in the middle of their fight, and OBVIOUSLY one of them had to die. What kind of idiot didn’t figure that out? Ugh. Anyway I am having another rant at the end of this, so I shall save up. My sister and I literally were laughing the whole time. When Zod attacked Clark after we thought he couldn’t  we started laughing, that’s how much we didn’t feel for the characters.

Superman/Clark Kent/Kal-El’s lines are also retarded. Let me replay a scene for you verbally:

[Lois has just gotten attacked, and yells in the most weird way. You know how some people eat weirdly and make certain noises? Well  that's what she sounds like.]

[Clark runs over and opens her shirt and sees a blood wound. (But really, your first instinct is to rip open her shirt?)]

Clark: This is an internal blood hemorrhage (or something along those lines). I can do things no one else can (in the most creepy way). Hold my hand, this is going to hurt. [Clark uses his laser eyes to laser (is that a verb?) her wound and she starts like squirming and screaming]

Now, I’m no doctor, but if someone is bleeding internally, why would you use your laser eye thing? How could that possibly benefit her? If any of you know, please, enlighten me.

Now I will have a screen rant following this super fly picture from my cousin’s grad party. SPOILER ALERT!

Behold: The Great Gatsby 2

Behold: The Great Gatsby 2

In the flashbacks, when Clark is a teenager, the actor for him is Dylan Sprayberry. He is mighty fine and pretty buff but his voice does not match one bit. In fact, when he talks he always sounds whiny. And he’s only fourteen but he looks much older! II can’t wait till his voice deepends. But I will give them props to finding people that look so much like Henry Cavill.

And, HOW ON EARTH DOES ANY ELEMENT OF THIS MOVIE MAKE SENSE? Like seriously, the dad (Jor-El) comes back to life? And that whole atmosphere thing? And then when Superman says “Krypton had its chance”. Umm, well Clarky, Krypton is a planet, not a human, or a Kryptonian, or whatever you are. AND THEN, all these bullets can’t kill Zod, but just snapping his neck can? Heck, then we don’t need Superman! We could’ve called over one of the Salvatores! And nothing added up. Why would they let Lois in the front of the line when they’re giving Superman. And why did they take her?!?! They didn’t even use her. And then Zod is like “uhhh, maybe since you care so much about humans you should mourn for them” and picks some random family, when Lois is clearly standing right behind? Come on, dude, you SUCK as a villain! You could’ve used her as leverage!

And then when Superman cracks his neck, he kills the family anyway with the laser eyes. Couldn’t he have cracked it to the left and saved himself some guilt? Really, it was a matter of two seconds of thinking. This guy didn’t use his logic. And the ship thing just happens to have a suit that fits Clark perfectly?

Now let’s do actor comparisons. I think Zod looks like Bill Hader. And when Clark has a beard he looks like a combo of Matthew Goode from Leap Year (2 stars) and Hugh Dancy from Ella Enchanted (5 stars). When he doesn’t have a beard, he looks like a combo of James Marsden and Matt Bomer. And why is his chest so big? I mean, come on, IT’S DISGUSTING. He needs to put on a shirt. Too buff isn’t good.

And WHAT is with all those Jesus references? In the beginning when the red head’s mom was like “This is a work of God”, and how he was all bearded and shirtless in the water and coming out of the light and the sky and how he could fly. And when his dad emphasized blessings and when Clark went to the church and the minister/priest/reverend/pastor was thinking he was Jesus because Clark was all “Oh I have to save mankind, and I’m an outcast”. And I swear when Jor-El appears, my sister and I thought Clark said “I have so many Christians.” But he actually said “I have so many questions.”

And anyway how pointless is that dialogue? No dip, Sherlock you have lots of questions. Just hop to it! Don’t waste your time stating the evident.

I did however like the end. I mean the very end. The very end. Like, when the movie actually ended. I liked that part.

Anyway, I’m mad this movie wan’t that well-developed, especially since it was an origin story, and if they’re making a sequel, I hope they improve. Or sack Zack Snyder. (say that 3 times fast)

Mulan

Zarah's Rating: 5

Zarah’s Rating: 5

Madagascar3-Poster-Animation_InfoRATED G: This movie is probably my favorite Disney movie. I can literally sing the entirety of I’ll Make a Man Out of You. This movie has it all: a great plot, funny characters, an empowered protagonist, and a kick-butt sidekick! I probably watch this twenty times a year… Every time I do my mom is most likely thinking “Doesn’t this girl have friends?” Well, yes Mom, and their names are Mushu, Ling, and Chen Po.

All of the songs in this movie are awesome, and overall it’s just funny. I really can’t think of anything else to say.

I feel like I’m going to be one of those parents that force their childhood upon their children, and then my kids will be like, “Mom, you’re so lame.” And then I’ll be like “Well junior, this was cool when I was your age”. Actually I like a lot of things that currently aren’t cool but I’ll just say they are. Like “Oh yeah, SpongeBob was all the rage in high school”. Yes, I still watch SpongeBob. My friend got me SpongeBob earphones for my birthday! (I’m still waiting for them by the way ☻)

Umm, yeah so that’s about it. Watch this movie. If you haven’t, come to my house. I live on 1600 Pennsylvania Ave, Washington, D.C. 20500. I will personally watch this with you. If you have watched this, then congratulations! You now have completed of the criteria to becoming my friend. I recommend watching it until all the lyrics are instilled into your brain, until you keep singing, until all your family members disown you because you won’t stop singing, even in public. Then you’re surefire to be my friend.

And remember! Think before you snack–er-act!

Let me know which Disney movie you want to see a review on next!

I’ll Make a Man Out Of You – Piano Cover by Kyle Landry

 

Hercules

Zarah's Rating: 5

Zarah’s Rating: 5

Madagascar3-Poster-Animation_InfoRATED G: This is the first movie in my Disney Collection. This movie is one of my favorites. (By the way, I’m not sure what’s up with the picture. I think it’s in a different language, but it’s the only big one I could find).

I don’t know if ya’ll are aware, but I have a bit of gospel in me, and the narration to this movie is done by a gospel, and they narrate in song. It’s too funny, and my favorite part is when the chunky goddess says, “Honey, you mean HUNK-ules!” I have a fascination with gospel music.

If you don’t know the story of Hercules, it’s this: a Roman god gets dropped down to Earth and loses his immortality, and to assume his rightful place in Mount Olympus, he has to prove himself worthy. Basically, this movie is super funny. It has a similar story to Lion King, if you think about it: a lost heir who needs to prove himself, an evil villain with clumsy minions, a strong willed lady interest, and a good hearted but forceful sidekick/mentor.

The villain in this movie is Hades, and he was sent down to the Underworld by Zeus, Hercules’ father, so he wants revenge. Some of you in my science class, look out for the minions of Hades. Their names are Panic and Pain. Sound familiar? That’s right! The two moons of Mars are Phobos and Deimos, aka fear/pain and dread/panic. Sorry about that mini science lesson, I had to! I really like all the songs (my favorite is Zero to Hero and I Won’t Say I’m in Love).

If you haven’t seen this  movie recently, I would definitely recommend it when you’re at home this summer and you’re bored or you’re sick or something, and it is on Netflix! It came on Netflix like last week, and I flipped out. Those of you that follow my personal Twitter might know what I’m talking about! (see box on right of page)

Oh, and another announcement! The Zammer Review is now on Facebook. I know most of us don’t even use Facebook anymore (I had deactivated mine, and literally only went on to make a page, and that’s the only reason I will go on), but I know some people still are on it, so I thought I’d be fair. If you aren’t on any social networking sites, that’s ok! You can still subscribe to this blog by email (in the bottom  right corner, it scrolls down as you do). All you have to do is click Follow, type in your email, and then you’ll receive an email asking you to confirm your subscription. Every time I post something, you’ll get an email with the post right in the email!

Ahh, the world of technology we live in…

I Can Go The Distance – Piano Cover by Kyle Landry

The Great Gatsby

Zarah's Rating: 4

Zarah’s Rating: 4

4

RATED PG-13: First of all, this movie is based on a book. If you don’t know that, then … I don’t know what to say to you. I read this book back in January, and it’s really good. The end is a little confusing (I had to read over this one part a few times). The movie and the book are pretty similar (from what I remember), and it isn’t like The Last Airbender, which uses both people of the wrong race, and pronunciation.

It is set in New York in the 1920′s, also known as The Roaring Twenties (the flapper era, my cousin’s graduation party is actually Gatsby themed! I’m dressing up as a boy). It’s in the point of view of Nick Carroway, who visits his distant cousin Daisy Buchanan (I used to think Buchanan was pronounced butch-uh-nan, not byoo-kan-in). Nick lives next to a mysterious man named Gatsby, who throws these magnificent parties, but no one seems to know who he really is. Gatbsy’s name is mentioned, and at this point in both the movie and the book, Daisy attempts to nonchalantly say, “Gatsby, what Gatsby?” [the clip linked isn't from this version of the movie, forward to 1:16] , but the audience/reader can tell something’s up. That quote always gets to me and my friends because Daisy sounds like a total ditz, like Lottie in The Princess and the Frog.

I will stop here. I don’t want to give away too much, because if you aren’t expecting anything then the movie is great. Since I read it though, it seemed to drag on (it was around two and a half hours). They also stretch out these party scenes, where basically Nick, played by Tobey Maguire, is just drinking and being super weird and awkward, and if I recall correctly, they put it in slow motion, and he doesn’t make flattering faces. They pretty much get wasted, and his face spazzes out in more ways than one.

Oh, and guess who plays the fly Mr. Wolsheim? That’s right, our very own brown Bollywood actor, Amitabh Bachchan! (whose last name is the brown version of Buchanan, I’ve always thought)

Okay, I’m going to put a picture of the book, and following that, I will have a little rant. So this is my formal warning, MAJOR SPOILER ALERT. 

For those of you not reading past this, goodbye ol’ sport.

by F. Scott Fitzgerald

The Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzgerald

Rant time. First of all, Daisy. She’s a little punk. Like seriously, what the heck woman? Gatsby DIED, and she didn’t even go to his freaking funeral? I hate when the main character is so helpless and constantly needs rescuing. Daisy, you put the dam[n] in damsel in distress. She was cheating on her husband, and granted he was also cheating on her, but then when the time came to go to Gatsby, she bailed because she “once loved Tom”.

And TOM! You are cheating on your woman, shame on you pig! What would your mother say? And then when your wife cheats on you, it’s a huge deal, but nooooo, when you do it, it’s a-ok, because you’re a man, and men can do anything. And use less hair gel.

Nick, dear Nick. He has an issue. But that’s already been made clear.

Gatsby, my, my, Gatsby. You are a rich, debonair, charming, and probably billionaire from what I gather, and yet you are hung up on this one girl from five years ago, who clearly has moved on (hello! She had a kid!), and you bought a house across the bay from her so you could watch her… I know most people found that endearing, but I found it plain stalker-ish. I mean dude, get on with your life! Write a book or something!

And Daisy (because she deserves two paragraphs) what kind of coward are you? You kill a woman, and you let Gatsby take the fall for it, and then he DIES, and you don’t even have the AUDACITY to call or send some flowers. I can only deduce that you are a gold digger, because Gatsby didn’t have any money back then, so you married Tom, and now that he does have money, you are all Team Gatsby. You, lady, are manipulative.

I hope you enjoy this movie, as much as the characters make me upset, it’s still brilliant. I think caring about what the characters do is a sign of a good movie, because you actually are invested in their lives a little. Or maybe Daisy is just an idiot.

I promise I’ll have a Disney movie review up by the end of the week. Comment what movie you want me to review out of the following:

Hercules
Aladdin
Sleeping Beauty
Mulan
The Lion King (my nickname is Mufasa)

Disney Movie Collection

Hello everyone! I have exciting news!

Lately, I’ve been super obsessed with Disney classics and music and everything DISNEY!!!! So this summer I’m going to start a string of reviews of all Disney movies! I’m super pumped to do this! A friend and I have literally been singing Circle of Life on the phone with each other for like a week now. With each movie, I’m planning to add a link to a nice rendition of my favorite song from that movie!

I love Disney movies because while to a little kid they seem so lighthearted and goofy, now that I re-watch some of my old favorites,  I’m seeing things I didn’t notice before (I’m mainly talking about Lion King).

Anyway, I don’t know which movie I’m going to review first, but boy am I excited!

Oz The Great and Powerful

Zarah's Rating: 4

Zarah’s Rating: 4

fourRATED PG: Ok first off, see this movie in 3D. It’s one of those that are actually worth it because of the special effects and all that jazz.

It’s like a prequel to The Wizard of Oz, which I’ve only seen once when I was little, so I barely remember it. This guy, Oz, is a circus magician, who is kind of a jerk and rips off people and uses his apparent charm to get women to work for free. He gets sucked into a tornado, and he begs to have his life spared and that he will be a better man. Then he lands in Oz (another world), where there is a “prophecy” that he is supposed to be the hero and save the place. So he’s a little freaked out because he’s just a meek conman. That is the basic premise of the movie.

There is one part where there are like these flying monkeys, and these are not cute little adorable chimps, they look like *shudders* I can’t even describe.

This is the creepy monkey. Imagine it in 3D.

This is the creepy monkey. Imagine it in 3D.

I’m trying to keep this brief, but I must show you this. On the other end of the spectrum, there is this cute little monkey.

This monkey is adorable.

This monkey is adorable.

I’m not gonna lie. At first I was surprised when I heard James Franco was in this movie, much less the main character. He’s not exactly the kind of Disney role model you’d expect to see. But then again, once in a blue moon Disney whips up some movie that is surprisingly dark and may quite possibly scar you for life ( The Hunchback of Notre Dame). I don’t know if you know this, but James Franco kind of creeps me out. His smile makes him look like a stalker and he always seems high. There’s this one point in the movie where he smiles and the camera stays on him for like eight seconds and nothing else is going on, so his smile just keeps getting bigger and bigger and I couldn’t help laughing (I would not recommend laughing during this part because no one else is, and the woman next to you might give you The Glare. But I did, because I generally don’t care).

This movie is surprisingly funny (more so than the cheesy kind that Disney is barely capable of) and it does have kind of a semi-predictable twist.

I wonder if when you get sucked into a tornado you end up in Oz. Too bad there are no tornadoes where I live.

Om Shanti Om

Zarah’s Rating: 5

 

RATED PG: I’m not so sure about the rating because it’s a Hindi movie, but PG seems appropriate. This movie is so funny! The first time I liked it because of the plotline, but the second time, I was just laughing the whole time.

Basically, it’s about this guy who is in love with this actress but she’s secretly engaged to a film director, but then she becomes preggers and the director dude kills her… Yeah, talk about Daddy issues. Anyway the starstruck fellow witnesses it, but then the director’s thugs kill him, and then he gets reincarnated and tries to get revenge. It sounds really stupid now that I put it into three sentences or less, but I swear it’s hilarious and Mukesh Mehra is a pretty swag guy (the antagonist). This movie is reeeeeeally long though, so be prepared to refill the popcorn! Actually, I’m not sure where you can purchase this movie, unless you live in New York or New Jersey or in that general brown area like Edison where the sketchy guy behind the counter sells DVD’s with hand written titles, and tells you, “No refundzzz.” (Go ahead and interpret that as an Indian accent, but let’s not limit ourselves! He could be Paki, Indian, Sri Lankan, Bengali.. There’s a whole world of brown possibilities! Heck, call them.. Brownablities). It’s a pretty risquè business.

If you know me and you really want to see this movie, I would recommend asking me at a time when I am mad [at you or otherwise] because this movie always cheers me up! There are so many quotes from this movie and I think I shall just list them now:

1. It’s so damn primitive (with the raspy voice). – Mukesh

2. POOF. Wego. POOF, POOF! (makes poof motions with fingers) – Om

3. Happyz endingzz. (hahah only funny because he says it funnily) – Om

4. (that whole situation when Om has a conversation with his mother)

5. NAHI! – Om’s mom (if you pay attention, I sometimes yell this out in class… It means NO! in Hindi. Whenever I say it all the brown kids lift their head and look at me haha. My family is like, “What’s your problem, we don’t even speak Hindi. Go learn Bengali, you white washed fool.” not their words exactly, I kind of just mushed them all up. One time my grandma asked me how are you? in Bengali, and I replied Teekay. which is good is Hindi. I guess I watch too many Hindi movies. Another time this woman at some party asked me if I wanted rice or something (in Bengali) and I replied that my name was Zarah. I know what you’re thinking.. MACPHAIL! Oh lord… )

6. Ooli baba – Om

7. Q bebeh, mezihai? – Om (I don’t know how to type it so I just put the letter q. It sounds like the word cute, but without the t sound and abrupt and almost like it’s cut off. It means What?)  I say this one too much.

8. Thumi RASCALA!

If you know me, you don’t know how much I hold back on saying these, because most of them are in Hindi, and I learned my lesson about screaming things in other languages in a primarily English speaking venue. (You don’t get good reactions)

:) PS This is one of my Top 5

The Help

Zarah's Rating: 5

Zarah’s Rating: 5

Madagascar3-Poster-Animation_Info

RATED PG-13: I loooooooooooved this movie. I saw it after I read the novel (which by the way is better, but one can’t compare; the books are always better! [there are a few exceptions]). This movie has everything in it: an awesome cast, humor (the first thing I look for), a heartfelt message (because lately I’ve been doing totally pointless and shallow movies made only for viewing enjoyment), and PEOPLE OF MY FAVORITE COLOR! I ♥ ☻ Don’t pretend you didn’t know that… (actually any dark color will do… The darker the better; in chocolate’s case, the darker the bitter[er]) … BUT WE ALL KNOW WHAT DARK CHOCOLATE DOES.

So this movie is about a writer (a white one [this is relevant because it takes place in the 1950's, a time of segregation where black women were typically maids or nannies, basically raising their clients' child[ren] with low pay and little to no respect, and cleaning and cooking. Basically taking the role of the mother, except the mother gets all the credit]) who listens to stories of being a nanny/maid to white people from the perspective of the black women. The writer’s friend, Miss Hilly, is super racist and is just all around ignorant (which is pretty much the worst thing you can be) so the writer keeps it a secret. One of the nannies is the main contributor to the “book” of compilations of stories narrated by nannies, and she and her friend gets a bunch of others to participate and basically it’s a big deal and it’s a really good movie so go see it!!!!!!!!!!!! I don’t want to give anything away, but I did cry (I think I did, it was a while ago. I watched it with a lot of other people, so I definitely know that TEARS WERE SHED). It really pulls at the heartstrings. . . Most of it is appropriate I believe, but like I said it was a while ago. There is this one part that’s gross but it’s mostly sad. I’m not going to elaborate, not because it’s bad, but because it will spoil it. You’ve got to pay attention when you watch this movie (which is difficult for a lot of us! I constantly want to talk during movies) otherwise it’ll just seem dramatic and dumb, which it’s not.

If you liked this review, or if you dreadfully hated it (most people tend to share negative things… maybe I should start making horrible reviews…) then GO TELL YOUR FRIENDS, PARENTS, NEIGHBORS, FAMILY, PETS (you would be surprised how quickly word gets around once you tell an animal), ANYONE ELSE YOU KNOW.

Tell them to read this review, AND see the movie. Because we’re both AWESOME GRAWESOME!

:) Till next time.

PS If you’d like to really enjoy this movie, read the book first.